Here is a short part of a long thread on my Facebook wall in response to Why Doesn't He Want To Commit?
Her: Congrats, Penguins can do some thing that you cant.... Commit. Oh and eagles, parrots, some kinds of fish, wolves, gibbons & certain types or rodents.
Me: That's a very small portion of the biosphere.
Her: I dont think I listed every single species. If we went with what the majority did every time then we would be doing all kinds of crazy shit. Plus when your [sic] old, lonely and no longer attractive I'm sure your happy memories of the many girls you once had will keep you warm and loved at night. The Penguins will have someone, but you wont....
This is something only a woman would project. Never once have I feared becoming old, lonely or unattractive. Why? Because these qualities are absolutely not linked to male success.
But it's nice that she thinks I'm attractive.
Whenever I hear of women complaining 'why doesn't he want to commit? Why doesn't he want to settle down?' I always think the answer is actually blatantly obvious: it's because he's not a woman.
In men, the drive to settle down and be deeply in love with someone you want to share your life with AND the daily desire to still fuck everything that moves coexist perfectly naturally, without dissonance. They are compartmentalized. They are both true.
Regular sex with one woman is not the male goal. Falling in love might be, but monogamy is more a price men pay than the happy ending it is for women. It's really giving up his natural destiny to fulfill hers. Again, there is simply no way to translate for a woman just how much a man gives up to be with only her.
By a rather huge margin, the people self-reporting having the most sex in the world are single gay men. The people self-reporting the lowest amount of sex in the world are lesbians in long-term relationships. On a grossly simplified level, we have there the male/female polarity. Promiscuity is not a gay trait, it's a male trait.
It has been suggested that in many circumstances being dominant is no more advantageous than being subordinate. For example, a dominant male may obtain a territory which is more resource-rich than that of a subordinate, but it may have to spend much more energy to protect it. Therefore, costs and benefits may more or less balance one another at each level in a dominance hierarchy, and evolution may favor the maintenance of the hierarchy itself, rather than just those near the top (which could lead to the disappearance of differences in dominance).
Source: Stanford University
When you listen, women tell.
By now I must have heard hundreds of stories of the men that have pursued women that I have dated. When I hear these stories I drill down for the details. I want to know why he did or didn't get the girl.
What did he do to make it just happen or what did he do to fuck it up?
My conclusion is simple, and probably pretty obvious to readers of this blog.
No Game = No Girl
It doesn't matter if you learnt Game from a book, from trial and error or by watching your dad tease your mum. If you have none you might as well save your time and just talk to the wall.
A week ago my new girl dropped the "this is never going to work" line while we were in bed. I totally agreed with her and started getting dressed. You can probably guess how she reacted. Without going into details, the last message she sent me that day translates in English to roughly "I want to be with you, please forgive me".
Despite this, making up with her today could have gone either way. After a week of me ignoring her calls and messages she had started to get over me (shock!) and wasn't about to jump straight back into bed. Naturally, I was looking for a resolution that put me back in the drivers seat.
Of everything that went down today, one thing I said had precisely that effect, and it surprised me:
It's not exactly my fault.
I chalk it up as a neg. A subtle one. Without accusing her directly and without getting angry I basically told her "you fucked it up" - something she had been telling herself the whole week.
That was the turning point.
A while back I blogged some Hot Or Not photos for women. Well today I found the equivalent photos for men online. Here they are.
The authors identify the following differences in the attractive face:
You can read their article online.
Most of us in the pick-up community like to rant on about how horny women are and how much they want us to fuck them. Well, today I read some refreshing counter arguments by Rollo on his The Rational Male blog.
A healthy male produces between 12 to 17 times the amount of testosterone a woman does. It is a biological impossibility for a woman to want sex as much as, or as often as men. Trust me, when a woman says, “I don't understand why sex is so important to guys” she's speaking the literal truth.
He goes on to talk about the effect of testosterone, estrogen and men's self-serving desire to believe that women want sex as much as them. It's a great read, and got me thinking.
As I leant over to wash the sand from my feet I saw someone give me a shy wave out of the corner of my eye. I recognized her face, but it took me a moment to place her.
She was the good one. The one I had seen playing in the waves with her friends. Playful girls make the best girlfriends.
We had flirted a bit, but I didn't really run anything on her. Now she was waving at me.
I sat next to her and as we talked she leant her leg against mine. Our shoulders touched and she smiled. With only fifteen minutes to spend together, we took a walk along the beach, chased each other and kissed briefly.
But now she was going, leaving me only with the number for her broken cellphone and the name of her town.
Some time ago I did a search online to see what girls write about guys on their blogs and forums. Here is some of the stuff I found which I thought was interesting (emphasis added).